


Inside of their dreams

by Haschaschin



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Fade Dreams, Post-Series
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-16
Updated: 2017-11-04
Packaged: 2019-01-18 05:37:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12381987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Haschaschin/pseuds/Haschaschin
Summary: Each time Solas visits Lavellan in their dreams she tries to talk and reason with him. So that they may have a happy future together. There will be a lot of chapters, with scenes I imagine would make Solas waver in his goal. Post-trespasser There will be at least one NSFW chapter. I will probably write both a happy and a sad end. So you may choose which one you prefer.





	1. Chapter 1

Inside Of Their Dreams

It happened nearly every night, that she captured his longing gaze, which wouldn't let her reach him.  
She tried to, but only moments before her hands could touch him, he fled vanishing into air. Those were the moments she awoke, crying desperatly, her remaining arm outstretched.

  
At daytime she filled her time with tasks. Withe the Inquisition disbanded, she visited her old friends in their new lifestyles, staying and supporting them from time to time. Still, she stayed in contact with her spies, working for her inofficial band "the residents". The name implied their right for their world, their home to be approved by the man, who tried to change it. It was a group, where everyone was treated equal by race, origin and gender. They helped those in need, gaining popularity and in addition new supporters for their task, even though they never interacted with politics. Often they worked with the so called "friends of the red jenny".

  
Their leader, a dalish woman without vallaslin on her skin, former Inquisitor and Herald of Andraste, had a different task. She travelled, waiting for news from their enemy, her lover. And at night he visited her. In their dreams.

  
She knew the scenery when she awoke in the fade, her physical body sleeping soundless. It always happened to be in the forest, if he happened to be asleep first, waiting for her. He appeared as a wolf in their dreams, his animal form as a shapeshifter.   
She walked slowly towards him, knowing where she would reach the point, when he disappeared, fleeing. As she arrived there, she sat down crosslegged and watched him. After a few minutes he calmed and sat as well

  
She raised her voice: "Ma lath, it is good to see you."   
His wolf ear twitched, showing that he heard her, even though he didn't respond.  
She continued: "I am not sure if you know but, by now I am travelling with Cole and Maryden. We've been to a nice place, where the people were especially happy to hear her songs. Cole gleed the whole time in delight, when their happiness reached others. Their presence even made me a little happy, though I've been having a lot of sad thoughts." His head held low, the wolf shifted uncomfortably. He knew that he was the source of her unhappiness.

  
Suddenly, she became a little embarassed. To stop her lover from destroying their world, she wanted to show him the worth and the beauty it held. Convict him to live in it with her, acknowledging and befriending their residents. Both of them blazing with happiness. To accomplish this goal, she spoke to him in their dreams. Told him of the good deeds "the residents" did, about the chances his elvhen organization had in changing the future of the elves in this world, the acceptance the mages under Divine Victorias rule had experienced. And of course, she talked about their love, their memories, her worries, and hopes.  
This night, she had prepared something slightly different. While travelling with Maryden, she sought her help and together they wrote a song. A song for her beloved wolf.

  
She prepared herself mentally: "I have a gift for you. I am not sure, if you will like it, but I wish from the bottom of my heart you may accept it and listen until the end."  
He looked her directly in the eyes. She had a pleading look, clutching her fingers, worrying and hping at the same time. He nodded.

  
Suddenly light-hearted, she beamed at him and rose from the ground. "What I want to gift you, is a song. I wrote it with all my heart, because I love you."

  
And then she begun. She had a very soft voice, and even though she wasn't the best singer, the song and the melody fit her voice range and the result was beautiful.

  
(I don't own the song. I found it on the internet: http://phemiec.tumblr.com/post/106929727700/a-solavellan-fansong-just-something-short-and   
If you want to hear the song. This girl made a video for it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x46QHercK4s )

  
when I was a child sat upon my mother’s knee   
by firelight she spoke of rights, and ancient history   
and one phrase she repeated though I knew not what it meant   
be safe, da'len, young lethallan,  
may the dread wolf never catch your scent.   
and as I grew I thought I knew the path my life would take   
but when the dream broke open, only I was left awake   
and then you took my hand and taught me how to turn the key   
I held it, how was I to know,  
I’d let the wolf catch wind of me?   
I took up arms, I lead the charge, some called me prophet, blessed   
and by my side you guided, wise and seemingly guileless   
but the truth’s not always obvious, not written on the skin   
sometimes to let the truth come out,  
you have to let the dread come in.   
you called me “ma vhenan” and showed me worlds I’d never known   
lands of mists and memories, of faded sky and stone   
then with words so soft and sad, you left me in that glen   
and though you brought me low I know,  
I’d let the dread wolf in again.   
my love has vanished through the veil so now I’m stark and bare   
at night I go to sleep and dream and hope he’ll meet me there   
he wandered from the waking world, I know not where he went   
but I’d be with my dread wolf now,  
if I could only catch his scent.

  
He blinked. Lavellan had finished her song and watched him, a little embarassed. She never had written a poem or a song for any lover before and she had poured all her love into it. And now she prayed that it would convey her feelings.

  
The wolf stood now, he had risen form the ground while she sang. Little tears fell in his pelt and he spoke the first words to her since he left her kneeling in front of the eluvian. "Ma serannas, ma vhenan." And then he vanished, slipped out of their dream. Solas was gone again and Lavellan cried in all her desperation and loneliness.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter focuses more on spirits. As these chapters will take place almost always in the fade, the spirits get a supporting role.  
> I imagine that Solas would probably deeply impressed by Lavellans new friends as he always had a soft heart for them.

Chapter 2:

And again they stood together in their dreams. He hadn't mention her song again and for quite some time afterwards he refused to visit her dreams. Lavellan made use of these nights and explored the fade of her own, as Solas always did. She remembered the things he said, his his ways to calm unfriendly spirits and how to watch for those, he wanted to meet.

The Dalish had a clear goal in mind - finding a spirit of wisdom. First of all, it was possible, that such an encounter would give her answers in how to move forward with her quest in redeeming her lover. Yet, her second aim, which was the one she wished for more, was that the spirit of wisdom would be willing in meeting the bald mage. Solas' opinion of these spirits had always been high but since one of his best friends hat been twisted and corrupted into a demon he hadn't found another of their kind, rare as they were. She wished for him to find a friend in the spirit, a guide and maybe a new reason to stop the madness he fought for.

It had been nearly half a year since they had seen each other in person. The stream of elves following his call had begun to diminish and it was just a matter of time till he would start to take actions. Lavellan had prepared herself with every action even while visiting her companions. Preparing herself in her dreams became another one of her duties.

She asked the spirits around her, if they could help her find wisdom. At first, they were reluctant. Solas had been one of the few mages to act friendly towards them in a long time and most distrusted the living. Lavellan came to them with an open mind and presented herself, her feelings and memories so they could understand her. Some tried to take her over but the former inquisitor felt the malicious intent beforehand and reacted in time. She knew her task was a dangerous one but she needed the spirits to trust her if she ever wished for their help.

Finally she met a spirit of compassion. It sensed her earnest wishes and showed her a good friend - a spirit of wisdom. Their first conversation had been very disheartening. "I won't help you", they said, "You took actions to find me and they were hasty and foolish. You were in great danger. Many rely on you. And you betrayed their hope. If you search for wisdom, it will come to you." Lavellan had no time to answer and the spirit had been gone. So she turned to Compassion to find comfort. She would ask the spirit about its life. And the spirit told: "I was born out of the compassion of an older lady. She had a wonderful heart. She wasn't loved by the people around her and knew the pain of rejection too well. Still she never ceased to be nice to everyone. She honestly believed that her compassion and love could change the hearts of the people around her. One day she saw a group of men staying at the inn next to her little flat. They had two elven children with them - a boy and a girl. Those poor things had been abused horribly by those bandits who had probably bought them on a slavery market. At night, the woman climbed out of her window into the inns' one and rescued them. They stayed hidden at hers for a while. She loved them. The first ones to ever tell her that she mattered, that they loved her. But at town the little ones were in constant danger. As soon as she heard that a dalish clan resided nearby she took them by the hands and walked towards the camp. An arrow ended her life as their little trio neared for the Dalish thought she was a danger to the children. She died, smiling, because she knew that her dearest ones were safe now while those two still cried for her name: Solaris. That was the moment Love and I, Compassion had been born."  
Lavellan sobbed over hearing this story and shared her knowledge about the only other spirit of compassion she knew - Cole. She promised to make the two acquainted.

Her nights in the fade became longer as she grew fond of Compassion and it of her. They talked about Solas as well. "Why do you believe that the path Solas took is wrong?", Compassion asked. Taking time with her answer, she said, "Solas wants to remove the veil he created. Once he thought his path would be the best for the world and when he saw what had become of the world he wanted it reversed. His actions were hasty and foolish, not well-thought. He should have taken his time. He should have spared more time to get to know this world and even after a thousand years he still wouldn't have had the right to take such drastic actions. He should have thought more about the consequenses the cration and the removal of the veil could bring. Who knows what happens afterwards? What will he do, if the new world will not be to his liking again? Will he still continue this cruel cycle of tearing down the world? There is not an ounce of wisdom in his doing!" She screamed.

And Wisdom appeared in front of her.

The next night she was once again in their little forest, Solas watching her. He had tried not to visit her, to not miss her but his desire, his grief had become to great. Her song had stung hard in his chest and he couldn't forget her words and love.  
Again she walked towards him and called: "Solas,  _ma vhenan._  It has been quite some time."  
" _Ir abelas_ ", he answered, hoping that she wouldn't vanish in her anger. It had been too long since he could look at her.  
"I am not angry with you.", she declared, much to his surprise. "I was worried. I wasn't sure if something happened to you. If you still cared for me."  
"You are my heart. As long as I live, I will care for you." It was hard for him to stop himself from speaking. He had missed her far too much and the delight that her sight and voice brought him let his feelings overflow.  
"Would you grant me a request as compensation?" It was a tactical question. She couldn't risk his escape.  
He hesitated. He feared the might she held over him. The only one, who could change his mind. "You may."  
"I want you to meet someone. Don't get lost. I am going to change positions." He nearly got lost, unprepared for her sudden ability to have command over the fade. When he got accustomed to his new surroundings he saw the bright-shining outlinings of a spirit.

She greeted it: "Hello, my friend. This is the man, whom belongs my heart. Solas." She turned "Solas? This is Wisdom."  
Agape he watched the pair. His  _vhenan_  being friends with a spirit of wisdom was the least he had expected. He cleared his throat. " _Andaran atish'an_. I had not expected to meet Wisdom, for it comes rare." He changed into his elven form.

"If you search for wisdom, it will come to you."  
"I have searched for it all my life."  
"Then maybe you searched the wrong way." It was a well meant advise.

The mage laughed whole-heartily. It had been the first time in three years that he had been so happy. He wasn't used to being treated like a juvenile scholar anymore.  
"I will think about that." Solas turned to Lavellan. "If a spirit of wisdom supports your claims, then I may have to rethink my actions. My next move will be very careful,  _vhenan_."  
She smiled slightly. "It would have been foolish to think this encounter would have completly changed your mind, wouldn't it?"  
He smiled as well. "Nothing you did was foolish." He faced Wisdom again, and Lavellan felt her heart clench at his finally light-hearted mood.  
"Spirit, would you please be so kind to take a little of your time and advise me as well. I would be delighted to hear your thoughts."  
"Very well", Wisdom said. "Yet for now, I will take my leave. I met your love, Lavellan, as you asked me to. We will speak another time."

As they vanished, Lavellan could almost imagine the spirit blinking towards her. She sprinted at Solas, who turned his head, eyes wide. One second before he woke she had reached him. He still felt her hand on his cheek, as he arose from his bed, remembering her face being happy as she finally touched him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a reason I named the woman 'Solaris'.  
> That name will return.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This time Lavellan creates a dream for Solas.

Chapter 3

Solas had reverted to his habit of observing her quietly in their dreams. Lavellan had hoped, that she had make progress, but her hopes had been crushed when she saw him again. He was a wolf again and had taken a step back for each she moved forward. Out of his reach, Lavellan had pouted a bit at first. She wanted to talk to him, to know if he had seen wisdom again. Her group "the residents" hadn't reported any activity on his behalf. It was, as if all of the elves who had followed his call had vanished. At least, he had stayed true to his words, that he would plan his next move very carefully. It seemed the encounter with wisdom had given her a little more time, but as she was still fishing in the dark, it was hard to estimate how much time they had been given in the beginning. The day he had taken her arm and kissed her one last time, he had said, that he wished for her and her people to live the rest of their years in peace, without having to subordinate under the harsh reign of the Qun. Judging by this they had at least two years, maybe more, minus half a year it had already taken to get to this point. "The preparation quarter", she called it in her mind.

Lavellan thought. Whenever Solas visited her in their dreams, he gave her a stage to perform. To persuade him to live their lives together in this world. Each stage could differ greatly and she was determined to make use of them. As she had in the weeks he hadn't visited her. The bare-faced dalish started to weave a net in the fade. She created a vision she had in her mind since her love for Solas had flowered. At first, it had been just an imagination, a little dream that wasn't fully thought through. More of a figment of a dream. But by now it had manifested, a clear picture of what she wished for their future. She wove Skyhold, a little greener, a little friendlier. Instead of soldiers, there were scholars of all races who wanted to study magic and the fade. The faces were a little blurry, but it was obvious that they were all treated with respect and friendliness. The mages had experienced a lot of acceptance thanks to Leliana who had supported them as Divine. If you watched down on the valleys between the mountains you could make out the edges of villages and cities and even though you couldn't see the residents, Solas knew that in these places all the races lived undivided and in harmony.

The wolf neared as he heard laughter. The dream formed the members of the inquisition, their friends. He saw Cole sitting near Maryden who sang in her beautiful voice. Cassandra stood with Varric discussing his newest book. Cullen played with his mabari, listening to Josephine and Leliana talking. Sera for once seemed very calm, lying in the lap of dagna, Blackwall next to them, carving something small in his hands. Solas could make out the hopeful glances he bestowed to Josephine who smiled sweetly back to him. Bull had pulled Dorian in a tight hug and the mage struggeled helplessly to get free, seemingly embarassed. Even Vivienne was nearby, sitting on a lounger because she wouldn't allow to be seated in the grass. Lavellan stood in their middle, watching her wolfs reaction.

Sera was the first to notice Solas, waving her hands hectically and screaming. Suddenly they all seemed to notice him, calling him to join them. Cole arose and walked towards him, as did his love. Solas froze on place, his fur rising on his back and suddenly he became very scared. The he noticed a different laughter, much higher pitched. The voice of a child. He turned, where a little girl of age two or three toddled towards him, looking a lot like the woman he loved. When she fell he changed his form to help her up. Her teary eyes were blue, just like his and he noticed that her natural hair color resembled his. The girl laughed as she grabbed his ears and called him "Papae". Then he felt a hand on his shoulder. Lavellan caressed him, smiling, Cole next to her, his hand extanded, anticipating. For a second everything stilled as Solas had to make a decision. All of them watching him, with smiles on their faces. Then he fell to the ground, hugging his would-be daughter, crying. Lavellan joined him and whispered soothing words for him. The image faded, even their little offspring, while his body quivered and his sobs woke a similar sadness in Lavellan, as she started to cry with him.

"I am sorry", she sobbed, "I am sorry." She couldn't stop apologizing, aware of the agony she had made him go through. Her friend Compassion lingered nearby, ready to support. It felt like an eternity until the elven male grew calmer, rubbing the last tears of his face and helping Lavellan to rise. "Your control of the fade became much better", he said.  
She answered, "You taught me well. And I never stopped my studies in the years you were gone."  
"You were always dedicated to your obligations. It is a trait of yours, i always admired."  
She shook her head.  
"Learning more about the fade is no obligation. It is an adventure. You showed me a whole new world to explore and at first I wanted to understand your fascination for it. Now I became addicted as well. Compassion and Wisdom are not the only friends I made and I discovered a lot of different memories. Once I even discovered a ghost to share his memories of its times in Arlathan. It showed me pictures of your younger self in return for my memories of as you are now. Your hairstyle suited you." She teased. "But maybe you were a bit too focused on your looks. Your pride was showing."  
He chuckled. "And again you manage to impress me. You wandered through the fade of your own and found someone who knew me? You truly are the rarest of flowers, flourishing stronger than all the others in a desert."  
"No", she countered, "This world and its inhabitants are no desert. If Arlathan was a forest, beautiful to look at, but static and confined, then this world is a sea of grass, with an horizon full of possibilities to live in it. It responds to the people who change it."  
Solas' gaze searched hers, her eyes unwavering and self-confident. " _Ir abelas, vhenan_. You are right. Your world could be so much more. That is why I have to continue with my quest. So that it may gain the utopia it deserves."  
"And you are wrong again. It is your world as well, because here lies your heart." She kissed him to demonstrate her words and finally he gave in and returned the kiss hungrily. The spent the rest of their dream holding each other, wishing dawn would never come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very short chapter.  
> I intended to design his dream as happy as possible, as I imagine it to be.  
> There are none of the elves of Arlathan or Evanuris in that vision   
> 1\. Because Lavellan doesn't know much about them, as the dreamweaver  
> 2\. Because she wants him to see the good in this world.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is divided in three successive nights, Solas will appear in the third one. The other two will focus on the spirits.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Few NSFW elements in this chapter. You have been warned

First Night

Solas wouldn't visit her again. Lavellan had guessed as much, fleeing at difficulties had become a recurring habit of his. A sigh fled from her lips. Morrigan had laughed at her and her appearing preference for chasing stubborn, old men. Her humor was pungent as ever. Maybe because there was always a little bit of truth in her jokes. Right now Lavellan stayed at the current hide of Morrigan and her son Kieran. The witch desperately tried to sever the bond that tied her to the ancient elven goddess Mythal - her mother. Mythal, who was called Flemeth as well had disappeared. Her daughter knew through the connection to the well sorrows how she had given her powers to the man they called Fen'harel - Lavellans lover. Funny, how everything connects, isn't it?

Well, Morrigan took advantage of the state Flemeth was in and intensified her research how to free herself of her mothers holding. She never believed in the elders death, as she had survived an earlier attempt on her life by none other than the Hero of Ferelden.

Lavellan had become her student, in magic, elven language and history. It had taken some time until Lace Harding, her best scout, got a hold of the witch as she was a very secretive woman.  
At first, Morrigan hadn't been too happy about this course of events. Her son, Kieran however had taken a liking to the former inquisitor and was determined to help her convince his mother. And they succeeded.

Back in the fade Lavellan tried to find Solas. If he was dreaming right now, she had a chance to sneak up on him. But either he was still awake or he carefully avoided her. At least she found Compassion. The spirit delighted in seeing her and they quickly greeted each other. "I wanted to thank you", it said, "for introducing me to your friend Cole. He has been very nice to me and his story is very fascinating. I did know, that it was possible for a spirit to take on a body this way, but I had never met anyone who had done so, before him. I understand his reasons. He too had been a spirit of compassion. It seems, our minds work very similar." Compassion smiled and asked, "Have you met Wisdom again? It doesn't happen every often, that they take a liking for someone and I wish for them to have a greater circle of friends to talk to."  
Lavellan shook her head. "Most of the time I am very occupied in my dreams. But, it seems that again I will face the fade alone for a while. So, to ease your worries, I promise, i will visit Wisdom tomorrow." She smiles. "Yet, this night belongs to you, my friend. Tell me, how is Cole? I was with him a couple weeks ago and Marydens condition seemed worrisome. I hope, they stopped travelling for her sake." Compassion began to tell.

And they talked the night away.

Second Night

Lavellan felt at ease, entering the fade. The lessons with Morrigan had been troublesome today and she just couldn't seem to get the magic right. It didn't matter, she knew that she could consult Wisdom in that area. In all of its lifetime it had gained a lot of knowledge from those, who sought its advice. Thanks to it she had strengthen her ability to control the fade in a short time. She had learned more in a single day than in the time before she got to know them. Even though she had met Wisdom only twice they seemed to have taken an interest to her. Maybe because they knew that in Solas' and her conflict, whoever succeeded, would change the world. It would affect humans, elves, qunari, dwarfes and spirits altogether. Her journey needed wisdom the most right now. Yet there was always a distance between them, that the spirit kept. Lavellan addressed the matter when Wisdom reached her.

"Your wisdom is diluted", they answered. Their tone was neither aggressive nor offensive, just plainly professional. The dalish woman hadn't expected this answer and was taken aback.  
"What do you mean, when you say 'diluted'?"  
"The path you have chosen right now is a good one. As the Dread wolf hasn't done this world any harm yet, it is still a possibility that he changes his mind and every struggle will dissolve peacefully. But what will you do, if his actions creates the first misfortune for the people, your people?"  
Lavellan knew her answer. She had sworn an oath to Solas, that their love would survive this road. She wouldn't harm him.  
"You see", Wisdom continued, "To be wise means to adapt at every new situation. For now your actions are the most wise, as no one suffers any consequences. Yet, you dull your senses with your feelings and those will stop you at one point from realizing what the best way may be. It is a fact, unless you intend to break your oath to him."  
"So you tell me to let my mind decide, instead of my heart?"  
"I mean to tell you, that those two should work hand in hand. Nothing good comes out of pretending either side of your consciousness doesn't exist."  
The elf sighed. "It is so difficult to decide what may be best for me, my friends, everyone. To weigh out which sacrifices to make. Is there even a way to stay true to wisdom with such decisions in mind?"  
"I wouldn't exist if that wasn't true", Wisdom told her reassuringly. "But I will give you a hint. If you ever stray to far from my cause, you won't be able to find me anymore."  
Lavellan laughed out. "Thank you. That is a great hint, indeed." For a moment she was in thought. "Does that mean, that there is wisdom in Solas' actions as well? You do visit him occassionally, don't you?"  
"No, it is him who seeks me out. And yes, your guess is correct. There is no sole solution to a danger or problem. Wisdom comes in many varieties, depending on the person, their knowledge and experience. There is no 'right way'."  
"You have given me a lot to think about for the day. Thank you." She gave the spirit a nod, which it accepted. The dalish cleared her throat.  
"There is one mor thing, I was hoping to ask of you. A friend of mine is teaching me a very difficult spell and I can't quite grasp it. You possess a lot of different memories, might there be one, that helps me in that matter?"  
The spirit answered without being hesitant. "What would you give me in return?"

Third Night

As Lavellan woke in the fade she was again inside their dreams. Yet, this one was different. The forest, Solas had created so carefully was missing and the dream lacked the usual clarity. The fade itself seemed much more vague. Then she noticed her lover and reddened instantly. He layed across a very large bed. It reminded her of the one they had shared at Skyhold. He didn't  
wear any clothes, the only exception being a scarf that prohibitted him from seeing his surroundings. He was tied to the bed posts, his cock fully erect and his moans reached her across the distance. A desire demon sat next to him, strocking his member carefully. When the demon realized Lavellans presence she arose, whispering a few words to sooth Solas. The women met, the dalish gripping the staff she had created out of will and anger alone.  
The female demon spoke first. "So it is you, I am imitating right now. Do not worry for your love, I will give him back to you safe and sound. I was attracted to his desire and the power our intercourse sends me."  
The elven woman was furious, yet she calmed her anger. "You must be very strong, seeing that you could capture him into this trap."  
The demon laughed to the point of little tears. Lavellan became annoyed.  
"What is so funny?", she demanded to know.  
The lilac colored woman with the deep black eyes catched her breath.  
"Trap you say? This is no trap, it is his desire. His mind is filled with his thoughts for you. Thoughts he doesn't allow himself to have. See the ropes he is tied with? His guilt for his desires followes him to his dreams. To be tied and taken by you out of your own will and against his own is the only scenario his guilt allows. I see that you desire him as well, you have a strong sense of possession for him that you won't share with another female. I am sorry for overstepping your boundaries."  
The woman didn't seem to want to bring her and Solas harm but Lavellan still stayed on alert. This demon was very intelligent and could easily try to distract her. Yet she still was a type of spirit and the mage tried to have an open mind for possible good intentions. So she asked in a diplomatic tone: "I'll accept your apology. You only reacted true to your nature. Still, I have to ask of you to retreat and never return. You touched my man. The only response should be your death." She hissed "Yet, I have killed too many in my lifetime and if the option presented itself, I would like to take the peaceful way."  
"Please let me offer a third option", the demon told, "I konw, you are furious as there are already several types of rages outside of this dream. If I vanish, they will come near and you will have to fend of yourself and for him. But if you would let me stay, watching you two indulge in these desires you have rejected for so long, that would give me much more pleasure than your lover alone ever could."  
Lavellan shifted uncomfortably. The thought of fighting a lot of rage demons (she counted at least seven, they stood blurry in the distance) while defending a disoriented Solas wouldn't be an easy task. And even if there was a part of her that wanted to deny it, there was this louder part which got really aroused by imagining how she fucked the defenseless elven man while being observed. It had been too long, this time she had gone without being touched by him that way.  
"I am not sure, if I can trust you", she said, "You are much stronger than me, if you managed to tnagle him in his dreams."  
"That won't be a problem", the demon answered, "if I had such intent, I would have simply cast you out. And you are wrong to assume, it is I who is stronger. This man hadn't slept in three days, he was exhausted. That was the reason, I was able to best him. He probably won't even remember this dream, come the morrow."  
To emphasize her point she gave Lavellan a view of her aura in the fade. It was true. She was a young demon, still lacking might.  
The dalish considered the offer. It was inappropiate, a violation of trust. Yet, she couldn't deny her own desire at the thought of finally being back in his arms.

A cry echoed through to her, as Solas began to call her name, asking where she was and begging her to come back to him. She could hear little sobs involved in his sentences. He had waited throughout their conversation, being unable to hear them and had gotten most anxious waiting for his lover.  
The demon looked first at him and then at her. "What will you choose?"  
Without an answer, Lavellan moved forward, hurrying to her lover.  
"Vhenan, please come back. Where are you? I'll do anything, if you would just return to me. Please, Please." His pleading cries became louder and faster. It was a heartening sight and Lavellan rushed over to hug him.  
" _Ir abelas_ ", she said, "I won't leave you again. I will always stay by your side."  
Solas' tears disappeared into the scarf, that covered his eyes. His mouth searched for hers instantly, and she returned the kiss. His tongue went into her hungrily, as if he was still uncertain that she wouldn't just vanish again. When she broke the kiss, he tried to follow her but was held back by the ropes. She soothed him by stroking his head, his ears and his face, all the places he found comfort in, whenever they had cuddled at Skyhold. After a few moments he had calmed down. "Why do you keep me tied,  _Vhenan_?", he asked. Lavellan looked at the grinning demon for a moment. That question was an indication, that he was still inside of his dream, where he wanted nothing more than to be helplessly devoured by his lover and enemy. He hadn't noticed the switch.

" _Vhenan_ ", she answered, "You wish to create a new world whilst destroying this one. Isn' t that reason enough?"  
"You could have killed me, now that you got me. Or in a tower with a dozen templars around me to deprive me off my magic. Why am I being tied to a bed?"  
"Maybe I like to see you lying helplessly and naked in my bed. It suits you."  
Lavellan carefully stroked her hand from his neck down to his collar bone, letting it wander further to his hardened nipple and lightly pinching it. Solas hissed sharply and his cock made a twitch, almost fully erect again.  
"Ellana", he said, it had been a long time since anybody had called her by her name, "You shouldn't do that.  _Ar lath ma_ , that is never going to change. Yet, it wouldn't do us any good to continue our love on this unequal basis. It's gonna sicken us."  
"Tell me",she wanted to know, "If our positions were switched what would you do?"  
His penis trembled with a glint of precum at the thought that left his mouth: "I would devour you."  
"Even if I would object?"  
"Yes", he stuttered, "I meant no. I really mean 'No'. Why did I say 'yes'?" He sounded desperate.  
"Because right now, you are deeply aroused outside of this dream and your mind no longer has any say in your answers. So, do me a favour and give yourself a fine and intense handjob, after you  _wake up_."

The demon screamed as it noticed the dalish' intenions, but it was too late. Solas awoke and his dream crashed around him, letting the rage demons charge towards them. Immediately Lavellan cast a protection spell that surrounded Desire and her. She apologized: "I am truly sorry, to break our agreement. I didn't want to deceive you, but it would have hurt me deeply to violate his trust and the love that connects us. I hope you will forgive me."  
The demon watched at the barrier and the onstorming demons, her former agitation clearly calmer. Before she answered she took a deep breath.  
"You used me to held away the demons, while getting closer to him and calling him forth from his slumber. Clever." The lilac woman didn't seem to take offense."There are no elves, I might call friends, yet you are somehow different. It has been a long time since anyone has treated me as a person. I enjoyed our conversation and thank you for the protection."  
The two woman nodded at each other friendly, as they both vanished, travelling to other parts of the fade, escaping the demons.

When Lavellan awoke, a sudden realization dawned on her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The spirits will have bigger roles in this series than I first intended. Our dear inquisitor will need all the help she can get.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lavellan realizes what kept Solas awake all those nights. Cannot tell you what it is though.  
> And finally a sex scene

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *NSFW

chapter 5

  
Lavellan watched out for the sky waiting for one of Lace Hardings raven to return with news. It had been two and a half weeks since her encounter with Solas and Desire. There had been a bad premonition of hers when she awoke.   
Why had'nt Fen'Harel slept for three days straight? What had kept him awake? She promptly wrote to all her headspies in the residents and even sent warnings to her friends, so they may watch out for any indications of danger.   
Lavellan hoped that her hunch turned out false, but she couldn't shake the bad feeling. Morrigan and Kieran, with whom she still stayed, had agreed with her worries.

  
"I believe I just heard a single raven flapping", Morrigan mused. She had watched Lavellan for quite a while now, supposedly training her, yet they had stopped when it became clear that Lavellan wasn't concentrating enough for their session. This resulted in a reaction as Lavellan now began to search the sky. Morrigan sneered: "I lied. You are hopeless. If you do not want to participate in my training you should leave now."   
The dalish sighed: "I am sorry, Morrigan. Please continue to teach me." She resignated and held her staff in front of her, waiting for further instructions.   
"Well, well, well. You gave in quite quickly. Now show me how far you've gotten on your own."  
Lavellan had just began to create her spell when a crow landed in between them. It was one of Hardings.  
"I did not expect that", Morrigan said.   
Lavellan would have smirked for that, if the situation wasn't so disconcerting. She removed the letter from the crows feet, carefully. As she unfold it, Morrigan reached up from behind, her eyes following the letters.

  
Dear resident Trevelyan

As your property manager, I have to inform you of the dire state your residence in Kirkwall is in. There are news that the entire city is flooded with demons. It started at the third day of Solace (7th month of Thedas' calendar). The people went mad and are destroying houses and the outer walls, to flee or hide. The army of Ferelden is already stationed outside of Kirkwall. They won't allow anyone to get in- or outside. The men and women who tried to flee are now in custody. Until they are deemed 'safe', they are being held captive by the army. The entire town is a quarantine zone.  
Your subtenants left the town right before the whole affair. They were called out to their families and are staying with them right now, if I am correctly informed. It seems that they won't be paying this months rent. As for me, I will stay at your residence and try to prevent the worst from happening.

Farewell, Melling

  
Lavellan hissed. Seven days ago. So that was, what had kept Solas awake all those night. He had destroyed the already thin veil in Kirkwall. And now the town fought against the consequences.   
"It seems that that fool Alistair is not much of a fool anymore. He quickly got ahold of the situation, "Morrigan said.  
"He is a fine man", Lavellan answered, "Shit." She sighed. "I am far too secluded from everything, hiding here. I am no help to anyone"  
"You are staying here for a purpose. You warned them beforehand. You did your duty."   
Morrigan took another look at the letter. "The part with the subtenants is coded. What does it mean? And who is Melling? One of the residents?"  
"Melling is the alias for Harding, as in 'mellow' the opposite of hard. She thought it was funny."   
Morrigan rolled her eyes.   
"My subtenants are Varric and Hawke. The letter says, they are safe. They cannot return to the city for now, probably because of Alistairs orders. I bet they are furious."  
The two woman stood silent, when they heard a sudden rustle of leaves. Kieran had eavesdropped.   
"I am sorry for listening", he blurted out, aware that his mother wasn't fond of him disregarding her orders. She always wanted him to stay inside studying, while she trained Lavellan.   
Morrigan glared at him, yet decided not to answer, watching the dalish rereading the letter.   
"So he finally did it." Lavellans words hung heavy. A part of the veil had vanished. Spirits already roamed the city, further consequences were yet to expect. And Harding stood inside the chaos, risking her life to watch out for them. It was a catastrophe. People and spirits died fighting against each other, corrupting their minds, even though they had just survived the clash of their worlds. Their blood clung to Solas' hands.   
"I have to go to bed. I have to watch Kirkwalls fate with my own eyes", Lavellan spoke. "I have to see the state of the city is in with my own eyes."  
"The fade will not show you everything correctly. We are too afar."  
"I will try to find Harding in my dreams. That will help me reach them."  
"What if she is dead already?"  
The women watched each other, staring eye to eye.  
"If that is the case, I will search for Solas in that direction. Kirkwalls situation is the reason, he didn't visit me those last nights. He observed the town. My hunch was correctly."  
Suddenly she felt very weak. "Do you think, my wish to redeem him is even possible anymore? He is a murderer."  
"It is possible!", Kieran interrupted, "The letter says, that Varric and Hawke left Kirkwall just in time. That is too big of a coincidence. Yes, he is a murderer, but he still has a conscience, because he could not bring himself to kill his friends. You have to prevent him from going further. Or else he really will be without redemption."  
The elf smiled weakly. "Thank you."

  
It had not been long, until she found him. Compassion had helped her, leading her near the source of chaos. The spirit had left quickly, afraid to get corrupted by the city. And Lavellan followed the traces of the man, that were so familiar to her. He looked at her, as she arrived.  
"So you found out. In the inquisition you would have gotten ahold of those information quicker."   
Lavellan ignored his stares and looked down on Kirkwall. The smoke coming out of the buildings was blurrish and slightly green, as the sky that towered over like a menace. Fiery red blended in with the green, whenever the flames reached too high. At the edges of the hole in the veil she caught the sight of the tents of Alistairs army. They were partly concealed because of the veil. It was the nearest position they could get to the town without putting themselves in danger.   
"Are you suddenly regretting I disbanded the Inquisition? You are watching our friends as do I and yet you cannot get ahold of me. You do not have the slightest idea where I am and that scares you."  
"Yes", he replied simply, "For a couple days I was afraid, you might have stayed at Kirkwall. That you died in there."  
"Is that the reason you lured Varric and Hawke out of town?"  
Solas smiled. "So you knew. I shouldn't underestimate your information network."  
She faced him.  
"So you still have a soft spot in your heart. That is good. It is not too late to convince you."  
His smile vanished.   
"Vhenan, you still believe in me? Even after seeing that?"  
They both looked down. From this distance they couldn't spot any people or spirits. But if they stared at it intensly, the fade gave them glances of emotions, of sharp pain, confusion, angst and sorrow. They could feel death reaching out, haunting Kirkwall, striking to the masses. Sometimes Lavellan caught a glimpse of emotion from a deceasing person. It broke her heart.  
"I have to believe in you", she finally answered, "Or else, I wouldn't be able to keep going."  
She tilted her head, wondering. "Were you inside of Kirkwall, yet? Have you seen it with your own eyes?"  
"No", he replied, "I still evaluate the daily reports, until I deem it safe enough. I cannot risk being corrupted."  
"That was why I hated being the Inquisitor. Sending people to their deaths so that you may obtain a crucial, tiny piece of information without being at risk yourself. And no one shares a sentiment for those poor souls."  
"You did. You always helped the people in need, without hesitation. That was why I fell in love with you."  
There was a moment between them as they stared into each others eyes, longing, the wish to stay in each others arms again. Yet the surroundings wouldn't let them, the fade constantly reminding of the near death.  
As Lavellan held out her hand, he took it, changing their position in the dream and leaving Kirkwall and all of its death behind. There were no words needed for both of them to understand. They were being back at the forest inside of their dream, their hands still locked.

  
Lavellan spoke without looking at him: "You do feel for the people too. You couldn't sleep for many days."  
He too watched in the distance.  
"It was the preparations that kept me awake, It was not easy destroying the veil ."  
"A part, yes. The other part that kept you awake was your conscience."  
Solas sighed. "I thought a lot about you those days."  
"Maybe a little too much", Lavellan mused and couldn't hold back a smile.  
"What do you mean?", Solas asked bewildered. His face showed genuine confusion, when they finally turned their heads to each other.  
"You do not remember? Desire had caught you, as you finally had slept after three days."  
Lavellan grinned devilishly as she send him a memory of his dream.   
"You were in a deep need. Your conditions were really hard and you couldn't even finish what you desired." The dalish tilted her head, parting her lips slightly as she watched his eyes following her every move. His cheeks reddened.   
"Did you have sex in all those years?", she continued, "Was there ever a time you fucked a woman, imagining it was me?"  
Solas moved around uncomfortably. It had been a long time since Lavellan had tried to seduce him this openly. Yet, he felt inclined to answer: "I have not even once betrayed you."  
"Good." She kissed him. It was chaste as first, then they started to use tongue, their bodies squeezing together, as if they wanted to merge. Lavellan let her clothes fade, suddenly standing in the nude, her left hand holding the back of his head, the other wandering down his chest to his abdomen. They hesitated slightly. But their desire kept the upper hand. Solas cupped her buttocks with his hands, lifting her up without breaking their kiss and Lavellan put her legs around his hips. He carried her to the bed that suddenly appeared in their dream, laying her down gently. As Lavellan caressed his crotch, he let his clothes fade so that she could finally take his member in her hand. Her fingers swiftly stroked up and down on his length, responding a moan out of him. He rmoved her hand and pinned it next to her hand, his kisses wandering down her neck, resting between her legs as he kissed her inner tighs. Lavellan raised her hips, desperately waiting for that smart tongue of his. How she had missed it. He didn't let her wait for long. He slowly licked her folds upwards and then focused his actions on her clitoris. His tongue danced in elven runes while he inserted the first two fingers, immediately finding her good spot as if they hadn't lived without each other for nearly three years. Lavellan squirmed under his touch, her hand stroking his scalp, guiding him nearer to her warm core. The other gripped the pillow next to her. He didn't mind that she pushed his head hard into her when he started sucking on her clit, her little cries further arousing him. He managed to fumble his other hand under his body, getting hold of his erect member. He grinded his hips down, struggling to keep rhythm.   
"Solas, just take me!" Lavellan grew frustrated , in desperate need of his penis. His head flew up, their gazes locking while he moved forward, positioning himself between her hips. His member found his way inside instantly, her slick juices leaving nearly no resistance. It was maddening.

He instantly grinded into her, his weight upon his arms to get a better angle. They didn't kiss, just watched their faces reacting to their heightened arousal. She watched Solas lick his lips when she let out a sharp cry after he had intensified his thrusts. He didn't pick up the pace, yet he put much more force in his movements making her almost cum instantly. His patience was making her furious as Lavellan thought she would go mad if he didn't give her the rough treatment she desired. She began to plead for him and for his, oh so fine penis. She watched as his shaft penetrated her, his head almost always inside of her. She loved that view. She couldn't look away and her cries suddenly became louder. As Solas noticed, he finally picked up the pace, thrusting into her deeper than before, watching her face, imagining to fuck that sweet mouth of hers. When she shouted his name, he felt the muscles of her cunt tightening and he managed only five more thrusts before his semen spurted into her. They both panted heavily, having watched their partner in their 'petit mort'.

  
They shouldn't have done it. They both knew. They had different reasons, but in the end they were not so dissimilar. But as Solas began to kiss his heart, lying down with her, stroking her head they didn't say anything. It was an enjoyable moment, a soon-to-be memory, that should not be tainted.

  
Solas awoke first. Lavellan noticed his absence. Her body felt heavy in the fade as she arose, looking around. "Desire!", she called. The lilac demon lady showed herself, she had disguised herself as one of the trees.   
"I must say, I am very pleased with how this ended. It was nice to deal with you, my dear."  
A single tear fell on Lavellans cheek, her grief to great to keep inside.  
"I betrayed him", she said. The finality of these words broke the dam and she couldn't held back her sobs anymore.   
"Yes, you did. But you gave him what he desired." The demon left without any trace of its presence.   
Lavellan tried to calm herself, clinging to the single strand of hope and whispered: "Wisdom?"   
The spirit never appeared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Solas' actions change Lavellan as well. Will she be able to stay true to her path?


End file.
